In most sports, lines are drawn to set boundaries. They indicate the space in which a game is played and how points are scored. For example, in football (or soccer), when a ball goes out of bounds, it’s an “out”. Lines also indicate the area a player is responsible for.

In relationships, I’ve found that boundaries help me stay sane. Like sports, I understand my role in the game of life. I don’t need to solve everyone’s problems, especially when it really is none of my business.

I no longer offer help unless asked for. I don’t probe into another person’s life unless he/she wants to share. I don’t make comments or give feedback about something unless it is asked for.

I listen. I am present. I simple am.

Being in recovery has taught me the importance of setting boundaries. This means accepting that I’m not the centre of the universe. I am not the alpha/omega. I am a grain of sand on the ocean shore; indestructible, hardy and a part of the infinite universe.

Fear has to do with the future. In extreme cases, it can petrify a person to point of dysfunction. For me, I become anxious, afraid, worried and I never follow through with any of my plans.

One of the biggest fears I have is the fear of the unknown. I believe it comes from the need to be sure; to have a solid grasp of things. I fear failure, and because I never try, I fail anyway.

I am afraid to fail as a monk. I am afraid to fail in as a teacher. So I never try. Which means I have failed.

This year, I will try. I will take risks. I will have faith. God will take care of me. I need only ask.